Where has the time gone

Hello Lovelies,

Today marks the 2 year anniversary of my lovely grandmothers passing.  My grandma was an incredible woman and I miss her everyday.  When my grandmother passed, it taught me to take advantage of each and every moment and live for the moment.  There were so many things I would have loved to have said to my grandmother but I never got the chance.

A picture of my grandmother from 1985

Recently, I was talking to one of my coworkers and we were talking about death.  Both her and I had different experiences with death.  Her father had a long battle with cancer and knew how long her father was going to live.  I unfortunately didn't have that luxury.  I remember the morning of November 21, 2010 like it yesterday.  I had gone to an amazing All Time Low concert the night before and stayed up really late talking to my friend.  When I woke the next morning I had 10 missed call from my mom and my house phone.  I instantly knew something was wrong.  I listened to the voicemail on my phone and could tell that my mom was upset in the message.  I tried calling my mom but she didn't answer so I called my house phone.  My dad picked up the phone and asked me if I had talked to my mom.  I told him no and he had to break the news to me that my grandmother had died.  I can honestly say that was the worst moment in my life.  I had seen my grandmother only 2 days prior and she was completely fine.  I couldn't believe she was gone.  When I had said goodbye to her, I didn't think that was the last time I would ever talk to her or even hear her voice.  My coworker and I have different views on death and which way is better.  Clearly, I would have liked to have known that my grandmother was going to pass and I would of had the opportunity to tell her how much I love her and how much she means to me.  Although, I didn't get the chance to tell her that, I hope that she's watching me from heaven and knows how much she inspires me everyday!

*Any one who is reading this needs to know that this is a deeply personal post and it is really hard for me to write this.  I'm actually bawling my eyes out while I'm writing this because I've bottled up my emotions about this for so long.  I miss my grandmother everyday but know her spirit is her with me.

My grandmother's high school yearbook picture.  I actually took this picture and have it displayed in my room

My grandmother's and I at Disney World

My grandmother and little baby me

Perhaps they are not the stars, but rather openings in Heaven where the love of our lost ones pours through and shines down upon us to let us know they are happy.  ~Author Unknown